How to Help with Your Child or Teen’s School Anxiety
Whether at the beginning or deep into the school year, parents may notice higher stress or anxiety in their children. You may wonder, does my child have school anxiety? If so, what can I do about it? It can feel frustrating if they don’t seem to want to talk about it or your efforts feel like they are going nowhere. You have so many questions. Keep reading to learn more about school anxiety, and some options to consider if you need some support.
What is School Anxiety?
School anxiety is not a clinical diagnosis, but it is a common experience among children and teens.
Often, children and teens report finding school stressful. Other times, parents are the ones who notice some signs and wonder about school-related anxiety.
Anxiety disorders are one of the most common mental disorders in youth. A very common trigger for children’s anxiety is related to school.
However, subclinical presentations of anxiety are also really common. This means that children and teens may not meet the full diagnostic criteria for an anxiety disorder. Even experiencing some of the symptoms can have a negative impact on a person’s life.
A diagnosis of an anxiety disorder should be made by a qualified health professional. However, recognizing the signs as early as possible and seeking evidence-based treatment can help your child get on a better path.
What Does School Anxiety Look Like?
There are many signs of anxiety, so the best place to start is observing differences in your child from earlier. Some children may have grown up with a tendency toward anxiety, so being observant of these trends is also important.
Here are some things to look out for in your child or teen:
Verbal expressions of worries about making mistakes, getting bad grades, or about what other people will think
Appearing nervous
Struggling with unpredictability or changes in routine, maybe reacting emotionally or behaviorally
Avoids initiate conversations or answering questions
Avoids situations when they do not know what to expect
Afraid of public speaking, or talking in front of the class
Lacking confidence, especially when trying something new
Does not want attention on them
Feeling shaky, or appearing shaky
Experiencing digestive symptoms or abdominal pain, especially in times of high stress
Experiencing headaches, especially in times of high stress
Sleeping worse than usual
Avoiding going to school
Concentration difficulties
Lower test grades than expected compared to homework
Certainly, there could be many explanations for many of these concerns. For instance, your child may also be struggling with an aspect of learning or attention. It is important to make note of these concerns, compare them with other caregivers and teachers, and discuss with your pediatrician or mental health provider.
What Could Be Stressful about School?
Many families are reporting that school seems more stressful than previously. Ever rising competitiveness in academics, athletics, and college preparations can feel like a lot for everyone. Some families observed that the sudden changes back and forth with virtual learning in 2020 also induced significant stress.
According to peer-reviewed studies, school anxiety in children tends to be related to one of three categories:
Generalized anxiety:
This may mean that your child is worried about many things, or have many anxiety triggers. However, these may show up more prominently at school. For instance, perhaps your child experiences a lot of worries about bad things happening in the future, which sometimes focuses on things happening in the home, but most often is about getting bad grades at school.
Social anxiety:
This may mean that your child finds social situations particularly anxiety-provoking. They may worry about others not liking them, including teachers and other students. They may get especially nervous in anticipation of being around new people or having attention on them. It’s certainly possible that your child is experiencing bullying, so be on the lookout for those signs and do your best to foster open conversations. It is also very possible that your child has been sensitized to perceived negative opinions of themselves.
School phobia:
This may mean that your child or teen has developed a fear response related to school, and the only way they feel that they are able to manage that anxiety is by avoiding school. Things that remind them of school may even trigger these reactions.
What Treatments are Recommended?
When searching for answers online, the amount of options can be overwhelming. Sadly, too often, the “get better quick” advertisements fall short of what they claim to do. As a parent, you are considering your knowledge of your unique child. You also may prioritize what types of treatments have the best scientific research and data, so that you can feel confident in your investment of time, energy, and resources.
Two of the best-studied modalities of treatment are psychiatric and psychological treatment.
Psychiatric Treatment for Anxiety in Children and Teens
If you are interested in pharmacological management, talk to your child’s pediatrician. They will either provide you with recommendations that they can prescribe, or recommend talking to a child psychiatrist. It’s always good to ask lots of questions and make an informed choice with your healthcare team.
Psychological Treatment for School Anxiety in Children and Teens
Psychological treatment for school anxiety offers a nonpharmacological option for children, teens, and their families to find relief from school anxiety. One of the types of psychological treatment with the most scientific evidence is called Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, or CBT. CBT is an approach that emphasizes empowering your child and family with knowledge and skills, and taking gradual steps toward reducing symptoms and improving wellbeing. Common techniques include learning about stress and the body, relaxation, handling emotions, talking about thoughts, problem solving, and communication. Your psychologist may also offer to work with your child’s school as a team. CBT may also help the whole family improve stress management by focusing on family communication, healthy habits, and relationship building. CBT is designed to be a short-term approach with long-term benefits, but talk to your mental health provider about creating a personalized plan for your unique child or teen and family.
You Don’t Have to Do It All Yourself
Watching your child be anxious about going to school day after day can be exhausting for parents and children alike. You want to find relief for both of you, and you want to find it now. You also want to find someone with scientific understanding and experience, combined with compassion and fun, to engage and help your unique child or teen. You want to find someone who will help you help your own child, too. If you’re ready to take the first step, click the button below. You’ll quickly get a free consultation with me, Dr. Emily Foxen-Craft, to help figure out the next best steps for your child’s anxiety.